The Quarter Life Crisis

It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are a lot of things about yourself that you didn’t know and may or may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren’t exactly the greatest people you have ever met and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you do not realize is that they are realizing that too and are not really cold or catty or mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job. It is not even close to what you thought you would be doing or maybe you are looking for one and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and are scared.

You miss the comforts of college, of groups, of socializing with the same people on a constant basis. But then you realize that maybe they weren’t so great after all.

You are beginning to understand yourself and what you want and do not want. Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging a bit more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and add things to your list of what is acceptable and what is not. You are insecure and then secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you or you lay in bed and wonder why you can’t meet anyone decent enough to get to know better. You love someone but maybe love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you are not a bad person.

One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap and getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision.

You worry about loans and money and the future and making a life for yourself and while wining the race would be great, right now you’d just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

3D – Friends Forever

The Best Days of my Life
As the alphabet ‘D’ in the english languagge,known to have given us some greatest values like Determination, Desire, Devotion also gave me Douglas and Denever,the persons without whom Dev(I) was incomplete.

Day 1 :
The Chemistry Lab:
One fine afternoon in the year 2003. Inside the chemistry lab,three strangers,one thing in common,the Burette with the pippette.Little did the three knew that in the coming years their roads would meet and would be leading into a single highway,the highway in which the three experienced the fruitful,funny and bitter experiences of life.
This was the first lab in my engineering life and there was a bit of nervousness in me as i had forgot to bring the practical book, which was priorly informed to us. Professor Mr.Sarur, Old man,shirt neatly tucked in giving serious looks,looked pretty strict and two people coming 10 mins.late to the lab had already took the scoldings from him,the atmosphere was very quiet and even a needle fall would be sounded clearly.All new faces looked very dull in the boring lab.

 
Myself(Dev), having heard from my cousins and friends that engineering would be one of the toughest thing for me to complete,as i was weak in math had to prove a lot in the coming 4 years,having changed the branch in the first week itself from mech to electronics, the big task was set ahead. The Diode had to be forward biased to keep the voltage flowing.
The professor hitting the duster on the table, to take the attention of the students, in his bold voice started to take the attendance,looking into the new faces after every number was called.There was a small smile in my face, it reminded me of my 12th std. days in which the professor,who used to take the attendance never took his eyes off the attendance sheet and there was very easy chance of giving the proxy calls.But in this case it was completely inverse.83.. 84.. the count continued.Our batch comprised of 20 members,the roll numbers starting from 81-100,having some beautiful girls,and, we had to be in a three member team based on our roll numbers. I was much eager to have a girl accompaning me in the team,as, chemistry was the subject which i hated from my school days and was hoping that there would be something to smile about in the chemistry lab.87.. when the professor raised his voice, half of my hopes were shattered,as the person bearing roll no.87 was a tall, slim boy carrying a heavy book in his hand,he looked very studious and like a bookworm.After answering my call to roll no. 88, only hope left was on 89, even it did not last for more than a minute and it was another lad wearing spectacles carrying another heavy book, felt similiar like the first guy. Coming with lots of hopes from mechanical to electronics,here also i was physically in electronics, but virtually everything looked mechanical.Looked at the girls faces who were waiting to answer their attendance calls, nodded my head against the missed chance and went to take the burette and pipette with the other two guys.
Denever,the guy bearing roll no 87 introduced himself, and 89 was Douglas,as the lab progressed quietly and steadily our interaction was started and i was very glad to hear that even those guys had the similiar intention of what i had about the lab team-mates, their wishes were scattered too . At first these guys looked pretty studious and like book worms, but as time passed i found them very fun loving,helpful and interesting. At that time i came to know its very difficult to judge the people by faces and their gestures.Although the wish of the dream lab girl was shattered, at that time i felt like i had got much more than that, two new fiends of my B.E. life Denever and Douglas.
The boring lab had concluded, and the three had a nice conversation at evening coffee in the ADIL bhai shop and decided to meet the next day morning. Denever walked towards the hostel fearing about the seniors,as,it was the ragging peak time and Douglas moved towards the bus station, which was 5 mins. walk from our college, as, he stayed in a different place which was 50 kms. from the town in which college was located and i moved towards my room which was in the same area where college was located.
Next day morning 7.30, after having the breakfast moved towards college, that day i had a broad smile on my face and it was not boring like other days, as i had found my new friends and was eager to meet them.Half of the class was empty as hostel students arrived 10 mins. late for the first class due to the breakfast que.
Being 15 mins. earlier to the class i reserved the seats beside me for Douglas and Denever and was waiting form them.
5 mins. after the lecture had started, a sweet voice “May I come in..” , Suddenly my eyes were taken from the book in which i was reading the problem which sir was about to explain, Tall, slim girl with long hair who was seen for the first time after the college start, disturbed the attention of the class and sat in the bench alone just beside mine.The concentration with which i was looking into problem was disturbed which i least minded, i was lost in the other world until Denver and Douglas gave me a shoulder push to occupy their seats. There were smiles all around..
Divya was the name of the girl..
After that..
Thodi Masti.. Thodi Yaari.. Thodasa Pyaar.. Param Param Param.. Yeh Hai JHANKAAR..

To be continued..

-chets

The glimpse of care

Neither it was a Love at first sight, Nor It was a friendship for a long time, It was just the “GLIMPSE OF CARE” she showered upon me, which will be remembered in her sweet memories for my entire lifetime.

“yanee yanee (In her soft tone)”, these were the first words i heard from her.Short, young, chubby, smiling lady.

Her words had a magic in them which were so pleasant to hear. In a city where it is so difficult to get something done due to the language barrier, she was always there for me.

CAIRO, 25th May,2010.

Having reached the city a day before, my excitement knew no bounds, as,it was my first abroad assignment. New City,New People, New Language, New Culture, New Currency. Many things were new for a man coming from Mumbai, the commercial capital of India.

The Cars population nearly equalled the humans, petrol being cheaper than water. The city infrastructure was built so good that there was rare traffic jam but the parking problem existed. The city,known for its GREAT EGYPTIAN CIVILIZATION, the pyramids,the pharaohic culture,the sphinx statue are the attractions of Cairo and the city has the largest Citadel.

Coming from Mumbai, where i used to stay with my friends, here i had to stay alone in the company’s flat for the next one year.One side of the coin was offereing me so much, on the other side, the loneliness was disturbing.

I was told that i need to prepare my own food, Having took the training from my mom, now the time had come for successful execution.The lazy man was put to some serious work. I was ready for the new experience.

Day 1, having spent in one of the best hotels of Cairo, today i had to shift to my new flat. Many thoughts passed

by mind about the flat, in which i was to spend my next one year.

Finally, i reached the flat with my two collegues from India, who were in Cairo from the past 8 months who also worked in the same client’s office where i was deputed. We were 15 minutes late.

Old Lady, Mrs. Salah, the owner, and her assistant Soffie had already reached the flat. The owner knew only arabic and we were layman to arabic language.My Collegues looked at each other clueless as it was very difficult to communicate to the owner.

Soffie, the native from Italy, aged between 26-28 had come to Cairo 6 years back and was employed under Mrs.Salah.

Soffie knew both arabic and english.It was a huge sigh of relief for me as it was easier to communicate to owner through her.

The owner had smiles on her face seeing us,as,the egyptian people love Indians. “Welcome”, she said. I smiled. “Amitabh Bachachan”, this was the next word from Mrs. Salah,she turned to Soffie and said something in arabic. Soffie explained us as “YANEE.. YANEE.. how much love the egypian people have for Mr.Amitabh Bachchan”.Her voice was was very soft and sweet, Whenever Soffie spoke she used to start with “YANEE.. YANEE..” ,Her words had some magic which were so pleasant to hear.

“Ur name?”, She asked me in her slow tone, after we had begin the conversation.”Chetan”, I smiled. She was getting this word so difficult to pronounce, she started to call me “Chin Chin Choo”, and started kidding with me,she felt happy kidding with me.Her smile was so attractive, I just kept seeing her smiling face and her chubby cheeks,this reminded me a saying from one my teacher during my school days “A Thing Of beauty is a Joy forever”. Soffie helped me to get few formalities concerned to the flat completed.

In just half an hour i had found my first new egyptian friend. She called me twice a day for the next two days and inquired about my well-being. I felt so much happy that some unknown person is so much kind and helpful to me. In a city where it is so difficult to get something done due to language barrier, she was always there for me.I got adjusted to a new place.

Days passed by, and day by day i was excelling in my work and and i had become a good cook. I had become a specialist biryani maker,the only concern was about the round chapati. A month passed by, there was a minor repairing problem related to the flat for which i had to call my owner. I decided to call Soffie, I tried calling her 2-3 times on the same day there was no response from her end. On the same day around 10.30 P.M. i got a call from her.Her voice looked bit depressed, she could not speak much and after inquiring about the problem she disconnected the phone.

I could not stop thinking about her, as, she was the one who had helped in an unknown city. There was no response from the owner, neither,she called me up in the next two days. After 3 days i got a call from her and the flat problem got rectified. This time her voice had no more magic. She sounded like she might be passing through a problematic phase of her life.She could not speak much.

 The Glimpse of care she showered upon me could not stop me thinking about her. I pray to almighty that my new friend, if passing through a bad phase, get enough strength to overcome the problems in her life. 

Neither it was a Love at first sight, Nor It was a friendship for a long time,

It was just the “GLIMPSE OF CARE” she showered upon me,

which will be remembered in her honour for my entire lifetime.

 –chets.